Shine Not Burn Page 9

  I was angled up so far, I could feel his balls hitting my clit. Just the slight tap, tap, tapping was driving me wild. It wasn’t enough. But his harsh thrusts were exactly what I’d needed, even though I hadn’t known it until just now.

  “Yes! Yes!” I screamed, not caring that they’d hear me out in the hallways and possibly on the floor below too.

  “God, I love fucking you,” he said between gritted teeth, the sound of our bodies slapping against one another echoing out into the room.

  “Yes, fuck me, please, fuck me!” I was begging shamelessly, but it just felt so right. I wanted to be his, to be taken by him every single night of my life. I felt like I hadn’t truly lived as a woman until this moment.

  I was riding the crest of a wave I didn’t understand. I was getting satisfaction from a hard fucking, something I’d never liked before. Where was this pleasure coming from? It had to be the most base, animal part of me. The passion was savage, carrying me away to another place and making me think and say and do things I never would have thought I was capable of.

  “Aaaaarrrrhh!” he shouted, sounding like a wild man sending out his war cry.

  “Aaahhhh!” I screamed. I was so close, so close!

  He collapsed on top of me, trapping his hand under my body. His finger came up to rub my clit as he pounded into me with jerking motions, grunting and growling with every thrust.

  That simple touch. Those two fingers barely touching me in the most inelegant way while he filled me completely. That’s all I needed to disappear into myself, to fall into the passion that threatened to overwhelm and swallow me whole. I spread my legs as wide as I could, angled my ass back as much as possible, and rode the wave as high and as hard as I could, screaming the entire way.

  He came inside me for the second time that night, and I experienced an orgasm like I’d never even dreamed of having, even with my very vivid imagination.

  Minutes later, or maybe it was hours, Mack slid off me and fell to his side next to me. I looked up at him, my hair in a tangle over my face.

  “What are you looking at?” I asked in a smartass tone.

  “A beautiful woman who makes me think I can fly.”

  “So what’s next?” I asked, fearing the answer. It was past midnight and Candice was sure to be back soon.

  “I have a really wild, really crazy, really stupid idea.”

  “What, like having condomless sex?”

  He grimaced. “Sorry about that. Is it… going to be a problem?”

  “Don’t apologize, it was my fault. And I’m on the pill.”

  “I’m clean if it makes you feel better. Doctor says so.”

  “Me too.”

  “Good. But back on track … that wasn’t what I was talking about.”

  I got up onto my elbows, blowing my hair out of my face. “Okay, then, lay it on me, hot stuff.”

  “You sure?”

  I pointed at my face. “Does this look like a woman who doesn’t know what she wants?”

  He tackled me onto my back, and forced a kiss on me. I let it melt into more heat for a few seconds before putting my hands on the sides of his face and pushing him away. “Stop stalling and tell me.”

  He jumped out of the bed and started pulling his jeans on. “Come on. We’re going out.”

  I sat up, confused. “Out? I thought we were going to snuggle.”

  “Yeah. Out now, snuggling later.” He picked up my dress and held it out in my direction.

  I scooted slowly to the edge of the bed, holding out my hand for the dress. I took it when he brought it closer, not sure how I felt about this sudden energy burst and mystery trip out. The cocktails and sex were like a sleeping potion, and all I wanted to do was rest.

  He didn’t let the dress go, forcing me to look into his eyes. “Do you trust me?”

  I nodded without hesitation. I shouldn’t trust him. He’s a stranger. I knew his body and the fact that he’s a sexy beast, but nothing else. I almost laughed out loud at how ridiculous it all was. But the fact was, I did trust him. Implicitly. With him, I knew I could be myself. I could be confident and sexy and in control. I could dream of a life that didn’t involve a plan that had to be followed for the next ten years. I could forget where I came from and who I’d left behind to become the woman I was now.

  “Yes. I trust you,” I finally said.

  “Okay, then, get dressed. I have a surprise for you, and I hope like hell you’re going to want to do it.”

  “Can I get a hint about what it is?” I asked, sliding off the bed.

  “Sure. Here’s your hint: Shine, not burn.”

  When he smiled and winked at me, my heart melted into a puddle on the floor. I realized in that moment that I was falling hard for this cowboy stranger.

  Chapter Thirteen

  I ROLLED OVER AND MOANED. My head was pounding, and I felt like I was going to throw up. The sound of snores pulled me the rest of the way out of my half-conscious state. I cracked a dry eye open and caught a blurry view of mangled blond hair next to me in the bed.

  “Candice?” I asked. My voice sounded like a frog’s. What? Did I take up smoking last night?

  “Wha…?” she mumbled, her face buried in a pillow.

  “Where are we?” I asked. I was afraid to sit up. The bed was spinning around the room too much for that.

  “Vegas.”

  “Where in Vegas?”

  She lifted up her head, her hair one giant knot hanging in her face. “Hotel room.” She dropped her face back onto the bed. Moments later she was snoring again.

  I rolled over onto my side away from her and stared at the nightstand next to me, trying to remember what the hell I’d done last night. My conscious mind wandered through the halls of my memories, trying to pick out facts and separate them from general fuzziness and the things that made zero sense.

  I remembered going downstairs with Candice and Kelly. That part was very clear. I put my hands on my bare breasts, glad to know I hadn’t fallen asleep with those gel booby-hikers on. My breasts would surely have fallen off due to lack of circulation after all this time. I noticed my nipples were tender.

  Sex. I had sex? Visions of the cowboy came flooding back. “Oh my god. I had crazy monkey sex with a cowboy.”

  Kelly stood in the doorway. “What’d you just say? Something about having sex with a monkey?”

  I sat up gingerly, holding my forehead when the effort was too much. “No. I said I had crazy monkey sex with a cowboy not a monkey.”

  “What made it monkey sex then, if there weren’t any monkeys involved?” She sat on the end of the bed, wiggling Candice’s foot. Candice pulled it away with a moan.

  “Shut up. I have a splitting headache.” I looked up at her through most likely very bloodshot eyes. “What did I do last night?”

  She shrugged. “Don’t ask me. I went down to the casino and ended up in the other bed this morning. I don’t remember much myself.”

  Candice spoke in the pillow. “You got drunk, you lightweight. And I burned an hour of good man-cruising time taking care of your sorry butt. You barfed like three times.”

  “Oh,” said Kelly, smacking her tongue and lips around. “No wonder my mouth tastes like kitty poo.”

  “What about me?” I said, nudging Candice on the arm. “What did I do last night?”

  Candice sat up with a big annoyed sigh. “How am I supposed to know? You came up with the cowboy, I left when it got crowded, and then when I got back here you were gone. I went to sleep, alone, I might add. This town is totally dry for good men.”

  A tingle down between my legs said otherwise, but I didn’t argue. I didn’t have enough memory to do it properly. Bits and pieces of my night in this room with the cowboy were trickling in piece by piece. My face pinked up at the memories. I stood, going into the bathroom and grabbing my cell phone on the way. “I can’t remember a lot of what I did,” I said, shutting the door.

  “That may be for the best!” said Kelly, shouting so I’d
hear her through the door.

  I looked at myself in the mirror. I had a hickey on my neck. I put my cell phone down on the back of the toilet and lifted my hair to put it in a ponytail. Two hickies. Another one on the other side. Great. Last time I sported one of these I was in eighth grade. “Yeah. You’re probably right,” I responded.

  I stripped down and stepped into the shower, soaping myself up while trying to put my memory back together. I met the cowboy around nine last night … what was his name? Mike? Mick? And then we came up here and had … sex. Yes, we definitely had sex.

  I touched myself down there and noticed my sensitive parts felt used, like I might have had a really good time last night. Flashes of him naked, of him in a hat and jeans, of him holding me in his arms …? Is that possible? All the memories were warm and made me feel … loved. Had I taken X? Was I drugged? Damn if I could remember what came next, after the apparently happy sex had rocked my world.

  I shampooed my hair and frowned in concentration. Where is he now? Did he just take off after we did the nasty and say, ‘See ya, thanks for the screw’? Where did I go after? Why wasn’t I here when Candice got back? What was I doing and who was I doing it with?

  I didn’t have the answers, and it bothered me on several levels, mostly because I felt like I really should remember. Like something important had happened, maybe even more important than crazy monkey sex.

  Candice came in and sat on the toilet. “I feel like a warmed over cat turd,” she said, slapping at the toilet paper roll, trying to make the paper spin off. It wasn’t cooperating.

  “You look slightly better than one, though,” I said, the devil taking my tongue and torturing my friend with it.

  “Yeah, well, hurry up and get out of there so I can have my turn.”

  “Isn’t there another bathroom in this fancy suite?” I asked rinsing the conditioner out of my hair.

  “Yeah, but it smells like Kelly-barf, so no thanks.”

  I squeezed the excess water out of my hair and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around myself. “Okay, here you go. I’m done.” I got out of the shower and left her to her business. When I stepped out into the room, I found Kelly standing by the end of the bed looking at a little piece of paper.

  “What’s that?” I asked pulling some underwear out of my bag and sliding it on under my towel.

  “Not sure.” She flipped it over. “Some kind of claim check, I think.”

  I walked over and took it from her. All it had was a number on it, no other identifier. “Did we put our luggage or a coat or something somewhere?”

  Kelly shook her head. “I don’t remember doing it, but I guess it’s possible.”

  I put the paper in my bag. “I’ll keep it just in case.”

  Kelly shrugged. “Okay. I’m going to get dressed. When does our plane leave?”

  I looked at the clock on the bedside table. “Three hours. Better hurry up. I need to eat something.” I was hoping it would calm my stomach to put some food in it. I couldn’t remember ever being this hung over. “Those margaritas or whatever they were kicked my butt.”

  “Tequila is pronounced ta-kill-ya. It’s not a joke.” Kelly left the room.

  I stood there for a second in silence. The nagging feeling that this paper Kelly had found was important wouldn’t go away. I walked back over to the bag and pulled out the ticket. “Where did you come from?” I asked it. The ticket didn’t respond.

  Picking up the telephone, I hit the button for the receptionist. When a man with an Indian accent answered I used my best attorney-conducting-discovery voice.

  “Hello. Hi. This is Andie Marks in room … oh, you already know. Okay, well, the reason I’m calling is I found a claim check I think in my room, and I was wondering if you could tell me what I asked you to hold there … in your baggage room, maybe? Last night is a little fuzzy for me.”

  “What is the number on the claim check, please?”

  I read it off to him and waited on hold.

  While I was listening to the hold music, a yelp and a scream came from the bathroom.

  “What happened?!” I yelled at Candice through the door. I couldn’t make the phone stretch far enough to go see her.

  “I’m sorry, Andie, I really am!” Candice shouted back, her voice a little muffled.

  “About what?”

  “Shit! Shit! Shit! I just accidentally knocked your cell phone into the toilet!”

  “Well, get it out!” I screamed. A feeling of dread crept over me. All my client contacts were in there and a million emails. I had them all backed up, but this would mean an entire day of being out of contact with my office. Talk about a nightmare.

  “I did!” She stuck her head out the door. “But I think I killed it. I’m so, so sorry.” She looked ready to cry.

  I was about to give her a serious guilt trip, even though it was pretty much my fault for leaving the stupid thing on the back of the toilet, but the reception guy came back on the line so I just frowned at her sternly and waved her away.

  “Ma’am, are you still there?” He sounded possibly nervous.

  “Yes, I’m still here.” Still here and now doubly annoyed.

  “Well … there appears to be a slight problem.” Yep, he was definitely, positively nervous.

  “How so?” I asked, feelings of misgiving washing over me. What did I leave at the desk? Please don’t let it be a monkey.

  “Well, some gentlemen came to reception this morning insisting that we held their bags for them yesterday, but they were unable to produce a claim check. We allowed them into the baggage room and, well …”

  I sighed. “Spit it out. I’m not going to be mad.” At least I didn’t think I was going to be.

  “Well, they identified what they claimed to be their bags and we allowed them to take them.”

  “What did the bags look like?”

  He whispered to someone on his end before answering. “Four duffel bags, ma’am. Like athletic bags.”

  It was the ma’am that he used that made something click in my head. “Was one of them wearing a cowboy hat?”

  “Yes! In fact, all of them were.”

  I nodded, sadness washing over me. He’d left. Without even a goodbye. Or maybe with a goodbye but not one I remembered. “It’s okay. It was my friend’s bag. You’re cool, I’m not mad.”

  He breathed out an audible sigh of relief. “Oh, good, good, good, that is wonderful news. And for your trouble and stress, please allow me to offer you and your guests a free voucher for another night’s stay with us.”

  I raised an eyebrow at that. “I’m leaving today.”

  “It has no expiration. Surely you’ll be back someday, yes?”

  No. “Sure, maybe. I’ll come get it when I check out.”

  “Wonderful, perfect. Thank you, Miss Andie.”

  “You’re welcome. Bye.”

  I hung up the phone, staring at the claim ticket. Why did it bother me so much that the cowboy had taken his bags and gone? I looked at the trashcan and stretched my hand out to toss the ticket in, but at the last second, I didn’t. Instead, I walked slowly over to my bag and shoved it into the side pocket.

  Shaking my head at my own silliness, I went about the work of getting ready to leave. Our flight was leaving soon and we had breakfast to wrangle and a taxi to hire. I ignored the haunting memories that were telling me there was something I should be remembering.

  Chapter Fourteen

  TWO YEARS LATER…

  I FROWNED at the stack of messages on my desk. Each one was worse than the last, with phone numbers missing, names misspelled, sometimes with nothing but a name. I read the last one with disbelief as I pressed the button on my phone that would make the light blink on Ruby’s: ‘Someone called you about something related to the Blakenship file.’

  “Yes,” came her clipped voice.

  “Rubes, could you come in here?”

  “The name is Ruby.”

  “Okaaaay. Ruby, could you come in here, please?
”

  “I’ll be there in a moment.”

  That moment turned out to be ten minutes long, and I’d bet a box of doughnuts she pretended to be busy the entire time just so she could make me wait. These days, Ruby did everything she could to piss me off. It had to stop now, though. We had to have the confrontation that had building for months. I had too much on my plate to deal with her shit anymore.

  She stood in the doorway, her back so stiff she looked like she had a pool cue up her big butt. She never relaxed around me anymore. It was all business, all the time. I wasn’t even allowed to call her Rubes anymore.

  “Have a seat, please.” I motioned to the chairs in front of me.

  “I prefer to stand,” she said, lifting her chin a fraction higher.

  I sighed loudly. “Ruby, please. Don’t make me lose my temper again. I’ve had a really long day and a really long week, too.”

  A fake-confused expression bloomed across her face. “Oh, I’m sorry. Am I the one to blame for your temper now? I suppose I’m also to blame for you losing the Goldman motion and for you getting that speeding ticket on your way to work last week.” She folded her hands casually in front of her ample waist. “What should I do now? Apologize? Or maybe you want me to resign.” She raised both eyebrows at me, still with the fake innocence thing going. It made me want to slap the look off her face.

  Her words hurt, cutting me through with their mean, serrated edges. I held up the stack of messages she’d taken while I was out. “You’re to blame for a lot of things, but right now I’d just like to talk to you about these.” I decided to save the conversation about letters never sent and forms mis-filed for another day. She was a handful when she was cranky and right now, she was definitely cranky.

  She said nothing, she just stood there giving me silent attitude.

  “Ruby, please don’t make me ask again. Come inside, shut the door, and sit down.”

  She hesitated a few more seconds, just to let me know she could and would, and then she did as I asked.

  Once she’d settled herself in the chair across from me, I let some of the heat out of my voice. “What’s going on? Can you please just tell me? I can’t take much more of the stress, I have to be honest with you.”